Monday, September 22, 2008

I'm starting over.

I have realized that I let myself go.
I got that bulletproof mindset and it's most definitely starting to tear me apart.
So here's to starting over and becoming a better person.
Yes, I "start over" quite a bit but I like to start with a clean slate sometimes and become a better person.

I am going to make sure I get all my chores around the house done and not stay up so late at night. My parents do enough for me...I need to start doing my part to help out as well.
I am going to get in the habit of brushing my teeth, showering, and washing my face every night. Yeahhh I'm quitting my never showering habit. Whoo Hoo! This shouldn't be something I have to work on...but I'm gross and I forget sometimes. Hahhha!
I am going to STUDY when I say I'm going to study. I refuse to let phone conversations run on through my studying time. I am shooting for straight A's come report card. Progress report is going to SUCK and I'm ashamed of that.
I need to learn how to balance out boyfriend, friends, family, guard, school, and my clothing line.
1. Family
2. School
3. Guard
4. Friends
5. Boyfriend
6. Clothing line
I wish I had more time for clothing line but the people in my life are more important than my hobby.

I'm going to be asleep by midnight every school night.
and I'm going to keep my room clean.
I'm not to needlessly argue or complain. I'm going to control things bothering me and focus on more important things than silly teenage drama.
I QUIT MYSPACE! Well, I cut myself down to only an hour on myspace a night.

Yeahh I think that is all I have to work on.
I'm going to start on my list :D

Saturday, September 13, 2008

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

I never thought that line could ever actually apply to something; at the moment, it most certainly fits.

I finally met this amazing guy. I know, I know, I ALWAYS talk about finding "the most amazing guy ever" buuut I have to find a flaw in this one. Just looking at him gives me butterflies. He's amazing. He's cute, goes to my school, not into drugs or sex, is funny, cute acting as well, and he can sing well.
He makes me incredibly happy!!!
The best of times.

My grandmother got admitted to the hospital yesterday afternoon due to panic attacks. The hospital kept her overnight and said she could come home today. Apparently, she has some sort of eternal bleeding and has to stay till at LEAST Monday to get tests and stuff done. She's really weak and her blood isn't holding iron very well. I went to see her today; she doesn't look that bad but I'm still incredibly worried. People with plans cannot die. We're going to Pigeon Forge in October and to a Scottish concert in late September and in 7 months we are planning to go to Toronto for a few weeks. Grams has too much going on to be sick. She HAS to get better, I just know it.
The worst of times.

I want to be happy to the fullest extent of happy, but I cannot. I want Grams to be okay and things to go back to normal